From The Mind Of Jay

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I’m always very open about things on here and this post will be no different. I was woken up at 6.30am this morning by a phone call from my Dad to tell me that my Grandad, who we’ve always called Poppy had passed away during the night. My family mean the world to me and Poppy was always the life of the party, he always had a funny story or joke to tell or song to sing. He was always the sort of person that it was great to spend time with me. I feel guilty for how little I saw him in the last year of his life but I know he knew I loved him and he meant a lot to me. I’m sad that he’s gone but although I don’t believe in heaven I’m sure he’s in a better place now and he’s up there with my Nan dancing the can can again. There are tears in my eyes writing this but I’ll never forget him and I’ll always carry him in my heart. Rest In Peace Poppy, thank you for all the laughs, you were one in a million, I love you always x

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And kid, you’ve got to love yourself. You’ve got wake up at four in the morning, brew black coffee, and stare at the birds drowning in the darkness of the dawn. You’ve got to sit next to the man at the train station who’s reading your favorite book and start a conversation. You’ve got to come home after a bad day and burn your skin from a shower. Then you’ve got to wash all your sheets until they smell of lemon detergent you bought for four dollars at the local grocery store. You’ve got to stop taking everything so goddam personally. You are not the moon kissing the black sky. You’ve got to compliment someones crooked brows at an art fair and tell them that their eyes remind you of green swimming pools in mid July. You’ve got to stop letting yourself get upset about things that won’t matter in two years. Sleep in on Saturday mornings and wake yourself up early on Sunday. You’ve got to stop worrying about what you’re going to tell her when she finds out. You’ve got to stop over thinking why he stopped caring about you over six months ago. You’ve got to stop asking everyone for their opinions. Fuck it. Love yourself, kiddo. You’ve got to love yourself.
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